… and we know where you live. That’s because you made it too easy for us to find you living under that rock near the reservoir which backs onto the prison which should have been your natural habitat for the foreseeable future. We know what you did last night. We know what you ate for breakfast. We know what you’re wearing. You’re waiting at the bus stop on Hackney Mare Street and we know it’s raining. We know who you’re meeting later today and we know where you’re going to be tonight. You’re going to be in a comedy pub watching a one-man Rock Opera based on the life of Heinrich Himmler. Should be a laugh. Nothing serious. You’ll let us know all about it in the morning.
We know that you like shopping for shoes. We know that you like selling make-up to your friends in an easy-going and social environment because it really isn’t a pyramid scam run by a Mormon off-shore tax company. Some people are just so mean and negative. We know that you actually believe the self-help slogans you post every morning. Today’s was particularly enlightening: “If you don’t know where you’re going, you might wind up some place else.” We know that you have a cat. We know what you think about Princess Diana and Nigel Farage. We know what you think about our special forces in the godforsaken deserts of the Middle East, the EDL and World War II.
We know who you are and we know where you live because you keep telling us. It’s a dangerous lack of awareness for someone sporting a target on the back of their head. Continue reading